feat(hooks): make destructive-bash-confirm opt-in

I added an OPTIN_HOOKS list in the Makefile and excluded those entries
from the default install-hooks recipe. destructive-bash-confirm.py is the
first opt-in. The recipe now prints the exact ln -s command for each
opt-in so users can wire individual ones without consulting docs.

uninstall-hooks and list still iterate the full HOOKS list so they keep
handling opt-ins that someone has manually linked.

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